New Practices Produce New Results

I have a saying; "Predictability Breeds Boredom".  Like driving the same way to work everyday and when you get home you don't even remember anything, the pictures that are on the wall that have been there forever and now you don't even see them.  Exercise programs that don't bring any new results because you keep doing the same thing the same way and you somehow expect different results.  Ok, so onto marriage.  You and your spouse have the same morning routine, evening routine and somehow you get to another year and wonder what happened.  Have I got you yet?

I know in my spiritual practices I must change my routines (even the ones that work) so I am staying fresh.  I know if I keep running the same routes week in and week out, I get bored and no improvement is happening in my times.  Duh!  So, it is with marriage.  Same arguments that never get resolved, just glossed over, same meals, restaurants, TV shows, same same same.  Romance is the same, maybe even your physical intimacy is exactly the same too.  WHAT TO DO?

I think a great idea is going to a marriage mentor or therapist, a marriage retreat, some sort of something that changes your perspectives.  Both of you.  They allow you to talk over things away from home that maybe are just too hard to resolve on your own in your home. Most couples are stuck.  Routine can get us there, granted some routines are good but even those need some consistent evaluation, some tinkering and sometimes even an overhaul.  Take a look together, as a couple over the routines you are stuck in that are getting in the way of your marriage thriving rather than just surviving. 

Isaiah 43:18-19 "Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland."

Jeremiah 31:25 I will refresh the weary and satisfy the faint."

Step 1. Is admitting you are stuck and your marriage is stuck and you personally are responsible.  No pointing fingers for no one is stopping you from living the way God has called you to live with and love on your spouse.  Go for it! Surrender, talk it over, confess your part and if you are on the receiving end of a confession, do your best to receive it and not rub it in their face.  Aren't you glad God doesn't do that with you when you confess?  Romans 2:4 tells us that it's God's kindness that leads us to repentance.  When you have done a simple (not complicated) Step 1. (admitting and owning) you can move onto Step 2. which you can read about in my next post.